Wednesday, October 10, 2007

Domestic Fugue

I made a little list today. I have Things on my Mind. And sometimes I can't attend to the Things until the things have been taken care of. It may be an internal agreement which allows Things (things Things) to Sliiiiiiiiiiiiide. So having, in principle, started some of the Things (involving, beerk, back-taxes on money not in fact earned, but red tape is red tape - thank you Christopher, accountant extraordinaire) in motion the things took precedence today so that we can finish the vicious little cycle.

things:

1. purchase and application of Biospot, spot-on flea control for cats, on cat. To deal with his very unwelcome new pets.

2. purchase, insertion (oh hush!) and activation of microbag in Hoover to suck up things

3. handwashing of collection of flimsy summer dresses. Seven of them.

4. calling my Mastercard company to dispute the $600 charge that the Alliance Francaise REFUSES to refund to me. The classes are due to start at the end of October, till early November. It's not like I'm ditching them in the middle...I decided: i) they are too expensive (for me) ii) I don't have 6 evening hours each week to devote to them, plus the hours traveling. Work has taken over, and iii) I know a personal tutor whose rewards (and punishment??)will far exceed anything the Alliance could either dream or OR be capable of. Bunch of limp willies. They have a separate phone line for these queries. No more cute Frenchy on the phone. Oh no, it's Longhue Island. And Longhue Island reads you The Policy. Doesn't listen to you, just reads it. Which says no refunds, only credit AT the Alliance. There was no mention of The Policy at sign up...no, just a purring lady Frenchie who lulled you into dreams of sunlit mornings with croissants and happy Canadian Frenchies.

This is America damnit!!! EVERYTHNG is refundable. Fuck off, Alliance Frenchies, it's WAR! I will eat ALL your cheese and hold your saucissons hostage. And you know what I can do to a saucisson far from its mother.

I'm not optimistic about the first round. I think those Frenchies have dealt with this before. When I called again, to another number, in an attempt to circumvent Longhue Island, the sexy-voiced lady Frenchie, when she heard what I wanted, said in clipped tones, Let me put you through to someone who will read you....The Po-li-cy.

We will NAIL your asses at the rugby. Oh, oops, we can't, because you're OUT! [see comments for my come-uppance]

5. Two loads of laundry, accomplished.

6. Purchased along with groceries my favourite Spanish Zoe tuna as a reward for all this activity. A Nicoise (it's OK, it's Southern, far from Paris) salad must be assembled. No. The pomegranates are not going into the salad. The beetroot is, though. Quelle horreur!

7. E-mailed the landlord and wrote words like Sliding Doors and Leaks. Ugh.

Other than that? Started the day well (if late...sorry Chris and Vivian) at Balthazar with a glass of champagne, a bowl of coffee and a croissant. Breakfast of champions.

And I wore my new boots. I have two pairs of new boots. I am very happy. Undertook to make a tart (lemon, I think, Dan) for Prune to say thank you for letting us film there next Tuesday. Somewhere in there I did some work and ate a Vietnamese sandwich at my desk. They've gone up from $3.95 to $4.50. So no longer dirt cheap. Just cheap. And still fantastic.

14 comments:

  1. Simply hilarious post, Marie! Limp willies??? Dreams of sunlit mornings with croissants and happy Canadian Frenchies??? How do you even come up with these things? ;-)

    Well, I think the cheese and saucisson threat might be effective, but then again they might call in the GIGN to deal with you.

    In any case, I support you 100%. Non mais des fois! Pour qui ils se prennent, hein? Aux armes, citoyens!

    P.S. Hmm, Vietnamese sandwich, you just reminded me I must visit my favorite local joint...

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  2. THINGS - thingz - thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiings!!! I'm so glad you were able to show some attention to a few of those things and get them out of your head. It can be a nuisance with them flying around up in there and distracting you from other, important things.

    By the way, did I mention that I ordered your birthday present yesterday? Actually, I ordered it right before our breakfast of champagne and bowls of latte.

    I love doing that.

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  3. Yes, Christopher, you did mention it. You are so sweet. Now stoppit!

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  4. Umm. The Frenchies aren't out of the rugby YET. They play Les Anglais on Saturday and we play the Argentinians on Sunday. The winners play each other in the final....... Go Bokke!

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  5. Thanks for the correction Jay :-)

    Blinded by my absolute faith in our lovely host, I had accepted France's defeat as a fact, shed a quick tear and moved on.

    But now... We'll see what we'll see on Saturday and Sunday. Go bokke! Oops, did I just say that out loud? ;-)

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  6. OH! I thought the winners of the Argentine/Scots game got to play the Bokke!Bleep.

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  7. "In next Sunday's semifinal at the Stade de France, they will face the winner of Sunday's second quarterfinal between Argentina and Scotland."

    That's what The Herald Tribune said!

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  8. Henri will mow you down at dawn Marie-
    And Vince. Yes, you said it out loud.. Start practising Nkosi Sikilele!

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  9. Herald Tribune is at least a week old - too many thiiiiiiings on your mind...

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  10. Note to (your)self: add to the list of thiiiings an up-to-date sports source... Like me, for instance. ;-)

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  11. Beence, I don't need to know about ice hockey, eh! :-)

    Jay - I'm so mown there is nothing left to mow. Could he blow me up like a mole, maybe? Actually, it's my mom who will be disgusted. But then it's up to her to leave a COMMENT on my blog...

    xxx

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  12. Marie: you don't have a choice, the Vince sports channel is a package deal, eh! Hockey, paragliding, diving, ping pong, jello wrestling, rugby, you get it all... ;-)

    Jay: after careful research, I have eliminated cooking recipes, tropical diseases, hilarious typos, Sweedish actors and exotic musical instruments for the definition of Nkosi Sikilele. So it must be an anthem. I'll start practising. ;-)

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  13. Oops, was going to sign Vince, changed my mind for Beeence, and the whole thing went through...

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